I am bored and have a lot of homework to do. Since I will do anything to avoid studying, I am going to do a tag that I have been thinking of doing for some time now. Obviously, the only way to make me write on my blog is to threaten me with studies! It is borrowed from my friend here.
1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn on page 18 and find line 4.
Communication is also affected by the physical environment.
2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can & catch?
A beautiful pink-orange stole gifted to me by my Mausi.
3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
I have not watched TV since August. The last thing I saw was an Indian soap called "Uttran" in India.
4.Without looking, guess what time it is?
Around 9:30 PM.
5.Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
It is 9:08 PM
6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
Another computer.
7.When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
3 days ago, on Tuesday afternoon (its Thursday night now). I went to school.
8. Before you started this Q&As, what did you look at?
The front door- to check if it was locked (it was not!)
9.What are you wearing?
A green skirt and a red T-shirt.
10. When did you last laugh?
I really don't remember. Sad, na?
11. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Nothing at all.
12. Seen anything weird lately?
Well, I got a packet of garlic cloves and they have gone bad and are spouting fungus. That is weird, since I kept them refrigerated all the time.
13. What do you think of this quiz?
Inane. But then, I don't have to study.
14. What is the last film you saw?
"What's your Rashee?"
Saw it last Sunday.
15. If you became a multimillionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Two BMW's- the sedan and the SUV and two mansions, one in India and one in the U.S.
16. Tell me something about you that I dunno!
Since I don't know who is asking this question, it can't have a valid answer.
17. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I would want Indians to be happy when a girl is born.
18. Do you like to Dance?
Yes. It is what makes me the happiest in the whole world. I forget everything and give myself to it.
19. Imagine your first child is a girl , what do you call her?
Raunak (it is a Punjabi word, impossible to translate)
20. Imagine your first child is a boy , what do you call him?
Advait (meaning "the One")
21. Would you ever consider living abroad?
I already do.
22. What do you want GOD to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
Welcome to my world!
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Ironical Superstitions
I have always been a very superstitious person, taking to heart the million or so do's and dont's that I grew up with. Everything from not going out after sneezing, black cat crossing, chappal chadhna, etc. A lot of them revolved around Saturday.
One of the most basic tenets was NEVER NEVER EVER to buy loha (iron) on a Saturday. This would offend Shani and bring his wrath upon you! It was like a patthar ki lakeer for us. My mom would not even buy as much as a spoon (since steel is derived from iron) that day. And I thought that this was something that most of India followed, since Shani is worshipped all over the country.
Quite recently, I was talking to an Indian friend who was buying a car. On Saturday. Me being the superstitious person that I am, told her that she could not possibly even conceive of buying a car (that's a LOT of iron) on Saturday. And she told me that in her state (in South India) one is supposed to buy on a Saturday. That it is good to do so!
That left me flabbergasted. And made me wonder. The superstitions that I grew up by and would swear by, reverted and inverted. IN THE SAME COUNTRY. It was not somebody from another country who was questioning my beliefs (which maybe I could understand). We had exactly the opposite ideas.
Another such incident happened a month ago. I moved into a apartment, and my in-laws told me to boil milk- and let it boil over- as a good omen in the new house. This was so that there is always "plenty" in the house. Now, in North India, milk boiling over is considered a very bad omen (witness the number of Hindi films with mothers-in-law screaming Apshagun, Hai Raaam if the hapless overburdened daughter-in-law was doing something else and the milk boiled over). Again, the same event reinterpreted from top to bottom!
So what did it mean, if anything? Did this not just show that all our superstitions are just that? If people in the same country can have diametrically different perpectives on the same thing, then it really does go to show that maybe we should question these beliefs.
Meanwhile, I'm still keeping my chappals straight and not buying iron on Saturday!
One of the most basic tenets was NEVER NEVER EVER to buy loha (iron) on a Saturday. This would offend Shani and bring his wrath upon you! It was like a patthar ki lakeer for us. My mom would not even buy as much as a spoon (since steel is derived from iron) that day. And I thought that this was something that most of India followed, since Shani is worshipped all over the country.
Quite recently, I was talking to an Indian friend who was buying a car. On Saturday. Me being the superstitious person that I am, told her that she could not possibly even conceive of buying a car (that's a LOT of iron) on Saturday. And she told me that in her state (in South India) one is supposed to buy on a Saturday. That it is good to do so!
That left me flabbergasted. And made me wonder. The superstitions that I grew up by and would swear by, reverted and inverted. IN THE SAME COUNTRY. It was not somebody from another country who was questioning my beliefs (which maybe I could understand). We had exactly the opposite ideas.
Another such incident happened a month ago. I moved into a apartment, and my in-laws told me to boil milk- and let it boil over- as a good omen in the new house. This was so that there is always "plenty" in the house. Now, in North India, milk boiling over is considered a very bad omen (witness the number of Hindi films with mothers-in-law screaming Apshagun, Hai Raaam if the hapless overburdened daughter-in-law was doing something else and the milk boiled over). Again, the same event reinterpreted from top to bottom!
So what did it mean, if anything? Did this not just show that all our superstitions are just that? If people in the same country can have diametrically different perpectives on the same thing, then it really does go to show that maybe we should question these beliefs.
Meanwhile, I'm still keeping my chappals straight and not buying iron on Saturday!
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Ignored blog gets some love from a friend
I got my first ever blog award. Yippeee!! And from a friend whose blog I love- and who blogs much better and more than I do. Thanks a lot, Rich!
You have inspired me to blog again. I have been a bad girl and have been ignoring my blog. Will come back soon. As soon as I settle down in the new place and get an internet connection :)
You have inspired me to blog again. I have been a bad girl and have been ignoring my blog. Will come back soon. As soon as I settle down in the new place and get an internet connection :)
Sunday, March 08, 2009
Happy Women's Day
As is my wont, I read the Sunday TOI and HT religiously (an old habit from childhood). As I read the papers today, they were full of news about Women's Day. Not only had they conducted extensive surveys, they also had the more 'prominent' women in India write their take on the importance of the day/ being a women.
I can only say it saddened me, depressed me, made me feel even worse. I think India treats it women badly. I also think that most of Indian culture is premised on the basis of women's oppression. Though a friend disagrees, what does he know? He is but a man!
India/Indian culture is a multi-headed monster, each of its heads incessantly pecking away at a woman's dignity, hope, freedom, liberty and agency. It never gives up. It often rears its head as a publicised Ram Sene incident, or a Sanjay Dutt news story.
But more often, India manifests itself in everyday small events, that never make the news. You know what being a woman in India is about? It is about slowly surrendering your dignity and hope to the larger beast of India.
It is about being groped in a crowded bus/train every day.
It is about knowing that you can never go out at night.
It is about not wearing what you want to wear.
It is about fighting to go to college.
It is about begging for a chance to study.
It is about choosing/ not choosing your life partner.
It is about dowry.
It is about wanting to learn how to dance.
It is about the liberty to choose/ unchoose to have kids.
It is about how I choose to spend my evening.
It is about public space (or the lack of it).
It is about how I spend the money I have.
It is about traveling alone.
It is about sitting in a pub and drinking (or atleast having the freedom to do so).
It is about having only sons.
Heck- it is even about the aashirwad you get- putrwati bhav:
It is about my mother telling me that she wants me to have a son. Because she could not have one. That she has waited 40 years for a son.
And I don't blame her. She's been mistreated by society who does not respect a daughter's mother. She wants better for me- and in her eyes, the only way to get there is to have a son.
It is about being pitied when you have a daughter.
It is about every girl child that is aborted.
My cousin sister did that. She already had two daughters, and so when her third child was a girl, she had it aborted. And eventually had a son.
It is about every single aunt, uncle and relative who knew about this incident and said it was a good decision.
It is about not getting married. After a certain age, a girl lives with the stigma of being single. She is an object of pity and sympathy- and the victim of every real/pseudo astrologer ascetic who can claim to find a cure for her singleness in her stars.
It is about every vrat, prayer and mannat a girl does/makes to get a husband.
It is about every relative's voice of pity as they bemoan your sorry state.
It is about how 'good girls' don't drink.
It is about why arranged marriages are better than love.
It is about duty.
It is about feeding your husband.
It is about washing his clothes.
Disclaimer- I don't want to say that the above is bad/good. Only that it should be a choice. Not a SACRED DUTY!!
It is about being told that your foremost duty is to keep house for your husband.
It is about sexuality. Or the fact that it should not exist.
It is about the fact that married women should not travel alone. Or leave their husbands alone at home to tend for themselves. How will the poor babies eat, clothe, sleep, drink, whatever?
It is about life. Or the fact that a woman should not have her own.
As I have reiterated often, a woman is not supposed to have her own life outside of her husband, kids and family (gasp! what else can she want!). And as usual, I was talking to one of my relatives (my bhabhi) who was trying to convince me to have a kid. She mentioned my cousin, who just had a daughter, saying that
"Pehle wo free hoti thhi.. ab wo saara din uske (apni beti) saath busy rehti hai"
Subtext: How awesome. That's what you should aim at too. Then you will have something to do with your life, a purpose to this childless existence of yours.
Well, that argument certainly convinced me!
Yes, I believed in female equality. Female freedom of choice. Once.
Now, I too often feel that there is no hope. No hope for any change. Its not about big gestures.
Its about what is entrenched in the minds of India's people. For every Sonia Gandhi, Renuka Chowdhary and Meenakshi Reddy Madhavan, there are a thousand silent girls, who wearily give up hope.
It is about parents not wanting to spend on their daughter's education.
With higher education getting more and more expensive in India, parents often make a choice that the girl can go to the local college while the guy goes to an expensively bought place in engineering.
I am sad. I am angry. And it gets me down and drains me of any hope.
For this multi-headed hydra goes on and on... in the life of every Indian girl, eroding her shreds of dignity, never giving up..until she does!
I am just another one of them... tired of fighting, tired of standing up, tired of them all... who never let me be.
I can only say it saddened me, depressed me, made me feel even worse. I think India treats it women badly. I also think that most of Indian culture is premised on the basis of women's oppression. Though a friend disagrees, what does he know? He is but a man!
India/Indian culture is a multi-headed monster, each of its heads incessantly pecking away at a woman's dignity, hope, freedom, liberty and agency. It never gives up. It often rears its head as a publicised Ram Sene incident, or a Sanjay Dutt news story.
But more often, India manifests itself in everyday small events, that never make the news. You know what being a woman in India is about? It is about slowly surrendering your dignity and hope to the larger beast of India.
It is about being groped in a crowded bus/train every day.
It is about knowing that you can never go out at night.
It is about not wearing what you want to wear.
It is about fighting to go to college.
It is about begging for a chance to study.
It is about choosing/ not choosing your life partner.
It is about dowry.
It is about wanting to learn how to dance.
It is about the liberty to choose/ unchoose to have kids.
It is about how I choose to spend my evening.
It is about public space (or the lack of it).
It is about how I spend the money I have.
It is about traveling alone.
It is about sitting in a pub and drinking (or atleast having the freedom to do so).
It is about having only sons.
Heck- it is even about the aashirwad you get- putrwati bhav:
It is about my mother telling me that she wants me to have a son. Because she could not have one. That she has waited 40 years for a son.
And I don't blame her. She's been mistreated by society who does not respect a daughter's mother. She wants better for me- and in her eyes, the only way to get there is to have a son.
It is about being pitied when you have a daughter.
It is about every girl child that is aborted.
My cousin sister did that. She already had two daughters, and so when her third child was a girl, she had it aborted. And eventually had a son.
It is about every single aunt, uncle and relative who knew about this incident and said it was a good decision.
It is about not getting married. After a certain age, a girl lives with the stigma of being single. She is an object of pity and sympathy- and the victim of every real/pseudo astrologer ascetic who can claim to find a cure for her singleness in her stars.
It is about every vrat, prayer and mannat a girl does/makes to get a husband.
It is about every relative's voice of pity as they bemoan your sorry state.
It is about how 'good girls' don't drink.
It is about why arranged marriages are better than love.
It is about duty.
It is about feeding your husband.
It is about washing his clothes.
Disclaimer- I don't want to say that the above is bad/good. Only that it should be a choice. Not a SACRED DUTY!!
It is about being told that your foremost duty is to keep house for your husband.
It is about sexuality. Or the fact that it should not exist.
It is about the fact that married women should not travel alone. Or leave their husbands alone at home to tend for themselves. How will the poor babies eat, clothe, sleep, drink, whatever?
It is about life. Or the fact that a woman should not have her own.
As I have reiterated often, a woman is not supposed to have her own life outside of her husband, kids and family (gasp! what else can she want!). And as usual, I was talking to one of my relatives (my bhabhi) who was trying to convince me to have a kid. She mentioned my cousin, who just had a daughter, saying that
"Pehle wo free hoti thhi.. ab wo saara din uske (apni beti) saath busy rehti hai"
Subtext: How awesome. That's what you should aim at too. Then you will have something to do with your life, a purpose to this childless existence of yours.
Well, that argument certainly convinced me!
Yes, I believed in female equality. Female freedom of choice. Once.
Now, I too often feel that there is no hope. No hope for any change. Its not about big gestures.
Its about what is entrenched in the minds of India's people. For every Sonia Gandhi, Renuka Chowdhary and Meenakshi Reddy Madhavan, there are a thousand silent girls, who wearily give up hope.
It is about parents not wanting to spend on their daughter's education.
With higher education getting more and more expensive in India, parents often make a choice that the girl can go to the local college while the guy goes to an expensively bought place in engineering.
I am sad. I am angry. And it gets me down and drains me of any hope.
For this multi-headed hydra goes on and on... in the life of every Indian girl, eroding her shreds of dignity, never giving up..until she does!
I am just another one of them... tired of fighting, tired of standing up, tired of them all... who never let me be.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Alone? Still?
Yesterday, some old family friends were visiting my parents. I happened to call home- and spoke to Uncle-Aunty as well. They've known me since I was a little kid.
And when I grew up, they were among the foremost people to be worried that I wasn't getting married. On time.
They even fixed me up two or three times- with their friends sons' (of course, it never worked out).
Considering that they were so worried about my single state, I assumed that they would be happy that I was married now. I last met them during my wedding (obviously they had been there), and this was the first time I spoke to them after that.
So the first thing Uncle says to me " Kya beta, still alone?"
I was flabbergasted.
"No, Uncle, I'm married now"
I felt this would make him happy, as he was always bothered by my unmarried state (I wonder why, since my family saw his about once a year). Though I would have taken offence at this statement even when I was single. But I could not think of anything else to say.
"I mean, you don't have kids. So of course you are alone."
Well, wow!! So first he kept fixing me up with random people, to remedy what he thought was wrong with my life. Now, he's still finding things wrong with it!!
But what bothered me most was the subtext.
A woman is alone till she's married. And she's even lonelier till she has kids.
She's never enough for herself. Her life, work, career, friends obviously don't count towards makin her any less lonely.
Hell, even the fact that she's married doesn't make a difference!!!
What happens when the kids grow up and leave? They, after all, define her life.
And the poor woman is alone. Again.
I can't even begin to get angry at this- because this is wrong at so many levels, I wouldn't know where to start. Yet I'm angry. Yet it bothers me. Yet, I don't know what to do.
Will people ever think a woman is complete in herself?
That she is GOOD ENOUGH for herself?
And when I grew up, they were among the foremost people to be worried that I wasn't getting married. On time.
They even fixed me up two or three times- with their friends sons' (of course, it never worked out).
Considering that they were so worried about my single state, I assumed that they would be happy that I was married now. I last met them during my wedding (obviously they had been there), and this was the first time I spoke to them after that.
So the first thing Uncle says to me " Kya beta, still alone?"
I was flabbergasted.
"No, Uncle, I'm married now"
I felt this would make him happy, as he was always bothered by my unmarried state (I wonder why, since my family saw his about once a year). Though I would have taken offence at this statement even when I was single. But I could not think of anything else to say.
"I mean, you don't have kids. So of course you are alone."
Well, wow!! So first he kept fixing me up with random people, to remedy what he thought was wrong with my life. Now, he's still finding things wrong with it!!
But what bothered me most was the subtext.
A woman is alone till she's married. And she's even lonelier till she has kids.
She's never enough for herself. Her life, work, career, friends obviously don't count towards makin her any less lonely.
Hell, even the fact that she's married doesn't make a difference!!!
What happens when the kids grow up and leave? They, after all, define her life.
And the poor woman is alone. Again.
I can't even begin to get angry at this- because this is wrong at so many levels, I wouldn't know where to start. Yet I'm angry. Yet it bothers me. Yet, I don't know what to do.
Will people ever think a woman is complete in herself?
That she is GOOD ENOUGH for herself?
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
GJam Story
I was feeling low, miserable and awful- which is quite a usual state for me. And whenever I do, I have this intense craving for something-anything- sweet. I just die for meetha...(which explains my size). Anyway, so on this day, my husband decided to make gulabjamuns for me.
Which was really sweet- not to mention ambitious of him.
He started with the Git GJam mix (you know, we, being the uber-cool gals that we were, called gulabjamuns GJams, golgappas Ggaps, Samosas Sams...etc. when in undergrad).
And before I knew it, he made a batter- yes, a BATTER- when it was supposed to be dough!!! We then started on the difficult business of converting batter to dough. Added tons of Maida, milk powder, sugar- and kept stirring. We still ended up with a sticky mix.
So finally, somewhere he decided that this was it. And went on to deep fry the lumps. Added them to the sugar syrup. And then hogged.
They were the best gjams of my life :)
Which was really sweet- not to mention ambitious of him.
He started with the Git GJam mix (you know, we, being the uber-cool gals that we were, called gulabjamuns GJams, golgappas Ggaps, Samosas Sams...etc. when in undergrad).
And before I knew it, he made a batter- yes, a BATTER- when it was supposed to be dough!!! We then started on the difficult business of converting batter to dough. Added tons of Maida, milk powder, sugar- and kept stirring. We still ended up with a sticky mix.
So finally, somewhere he decided that this was it. And went on to deep fry the lumps. Added them to the sugar syrup. And then hogged.
They were the best gjams of my life :)
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Borrowed Tag
A friend of mine tagged me on Facebook a few hours ago. And since I have nothing better to do with my life, I spent three hours doing the tag. Furthermore, I am reproducing it here- again, since I have nothing better to write about!
25 Random Facts About ... Me
1. My greatest desire in the whole world is to be thin- and it is also my greatest regret that till now, I have not been able to get there.
2. I cry in every single movie I see- even Shrek 3. Worst ever was Titanic, when I could not stop for 12 straight hours. And Veer-Zaara (don't ask).
3. I love FOOD- completely. Anything, anytime, any type. My wildest fantasies are ALL about food.
4. I am obsessive about dirty dishes and can't live with them. I have gotten up at 3:00 AM and cleaned the dishes (a number of times).
5. I love Shahrukh Khan. Completely.
6. I am an inveterate pill-popper and keep popping pills for the lamest excuses. Headache, stomache, lack of energy, any random pain, cold, laziness, grief, sulking, moody, unhappy, low... you name it, and I will promptly go and have a pill. And they DO make me feel better!
7. I love dancing. Its makes me feel really joyful. But only on Bollywood/ Bhangra.
8. The one thing I miss most about India is Chaat. And Golgappe. And Mithai. (its mostly all food).
9. I love BLING. The glitzier and shinier the better (that's the Punjabi in me).
10. I am the only one in my entire extended family to NOT have had an arranged marriage and the only one to have married outside my community.
11. I am a great Cook. I cook lovely tasty wonderful Indian food (mostly because I love food, and can't eat stuff I don't find delicious. So I make sure I cook it that way).
12. I have read more than 6,000 M&B's in my life (yes, now you know what a sucker I am for romance).
13. I can NOT eat sweet ice-cream. I have only had chocolate or coffee ice-cream for the last 18 years of my life. I hate ice-cream that is sweet!
14. I want to get my hair colored. Too scared about the consequences.
15. I am very scared of getting osteoarthritis/ porosis later in life and so I take calcium supplements daily.
16. I hate big cities and never want to live in one.
17. I want to see Europe- especially Rome and Venice- in my lifetime.
18. I am trying to start flossing daily but am too lazy. I only manage 2 times a week.
19. I have always wanted to get my nose pierced but am too scared and don't have the guts to go through with it. Also am not sure whether it will look good on me.
20. I love the smell of mingled cigarette smoke and sweet elaichi chai on a man's breath.
21. I have actually gone up to Nikhil Chinappa (MTV was visiting our college) and told him I loved him and that I had been in love with him for a number of years.
22. I really appreciate how all cars on the road stop when there is an ambulance/ fire engine/ emergency vehicle passing. This practice can mean a life saved- especially when I think about Indian traffic. So I am REALLY IMPRESSED with this.
23. I very often have nightmares in which my greatest fears materialize. I have often woken up crying or shaken/ scared.
24. I love dressing up in Indian clothes- and I think sarees/suits are way more graceful and beautiful than western wear.
25. I am one of the nicest people I know :)
25 Random Facts About ... Me
1. My greatest desire in the whole world is to be thin- and it is also my greatest regret that till now, I have not been able to get there.
2. I cry in every single movie I see- even Shrek 3. Worst ever was Titanic, when I could not stop for 12 straight hours. And Veer-Zaara (don't ask).
3. I love FOOD- completely. Anything, anytime, any type. My wildest fantasies are ALL about food.
4. I am obsessive about dirty dishes and can't live with them. I have gotten up at 3:00 AM and cleaned the dishes (a number of times).
5. I love Shahrukh Khan. Completely.
6. I am an inveterate pill-popper and keep popping pills for the lamest excuses. Headache, stomache, lack of energy, any random pain, cold, laziness, grief, sulking, moody, unhappy, low... you name it, and I will promptly go and have a pill. And they DO make me feel better!
7. I love dancing. Its makes me feel really joyful. But only on Bollywood/ Bhangra.
8. The one thing I miss most about India is Chaat. And Golgappe. And Mithai. (its mostly all food).
9. I love BLING. The glitzier and shinier the better (that's the Punjabi in me).
10. I am the only one in my entire extended family to NOT have had an arranged marriage and the only one to have married outside my community.
11. I am a great Cook. I cook lovely tasty wonderful Indian food (mostly because I love food, and can't eat stuff I don't find delicious. So I make sure I cook it that way).
12. I have read more than 6,000 M&B's in my life (yes, now you know what a sucker I am for romance).
13. I can NOT eat sweet ice-cream. I have only had chocolate or coffee ice-cream for the last 18 years of my life. I hate ice-cream that is sweet!
14. I want to get my hair colored. Too scared about the consequences.
15. I am very scared of getting osteoarthritis/ porosis later in life and so I take calcium supplements daily.
16. I hate big cities and never want to live in one.
17. I want to see Europe- especially Rome and Venice- in my lifetime.
18. I am trying to start flossing daily but am too lazy. I only manage 2 times a week.
19. I have always wanted to get my nose pierced but am too scared and don't have the guts to go through with it. Also am not sure whether it will look good on me.
20. I love the smell of mingled cigarette smoke and sweet elaichi chai on a man's breath.
21. I have actually gone up to Nikhil Chinappa (MTV was visiting our college) and told him I loved him and that I had been in love with him for a number of years.
22. I really appreciate how all cars on the road stop when there is an ambulance/ fire engine/ emergency vehicle passing. This practice can mean a life saved- especially when I think about Indian traffic. So I am REALLY IMPRESSED with this.
23. I very often have nightmares in which my greatest fears materialize. I have often woken up crying or shaken/ scared.
24. I love dressing up in Indian clothes- and I think sarees/suits are way more graceful and beautiful than western wear.
25. I am one of the nicest people I know :)
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Lighting up your life!!
Yes- that is what I can say about Shahrukh Khan and his movies- and my life :)
He is the light of my life ( my husband comes a close second ;)
His movies are just so utterly feel good and make me really really happy and smiley and gooey and mushy :)
As you must have guessed by now, I saw "Rab ne bana di Jodi" yesterday. And still haven't stopped smiling. As usual. Me being the starry-eyed romantic that I am, I loved the movie.
I loved its premise. As I said a long time ago, SRK movies/ dialogues become the latest truth in my life. And this time, as always, its about love and loving and giving and making the right choices... even through impossible epiphanies.
And of course, I cried. Tears poured silently down my face as the girl realizes the value of true, silent, eternal love.. as she makes a difficult, but the right choice (this sentence sounds so cheesy, but whatever. That is love for you ;).
As the girl realizes who her "Rab" (which is Punjabi for God) is. For that is what the movie is all about... seeing God in the one you love...
"Tujhme rab dikhta hai...yaara mai kya karoon" goes the refrain in the movie.
Another reason I loved the movie was because of Amritsar. My mother belongs to the city, so I have a lot of family there. And also because of the Golden Temple (the movie has a lot of scenes of the Golden temple, with major moments happening there). Where we would go every time we visited Amritsar, every year in the summer vacation. Where I learnt to make my childish requests to God. Where I sat eating the awesome 'kadha'. Where I prayed and hoped as I circled the Wishing Tree.
Where I last went a few days before I got married. To get Rab's blessings. To say thanks.
To say that I had found the one person in the world, in whom I could see God.
He is the light of my life ( my husband comes a close second ;)
His movies are just so utterly feel good and make me really really happy and smiley and gooey and mushy :)
As you must have guessed by now, I saw "Rab ne bana di Jodi" yesterday. And still haven't stopped smiling. As usual. Me being the starry-eyed romantic that I am, I loved the movie.
I loved its premise. As I said a long time ago, SRK movies/ dialogues become the latest truth in my life. And this time, as always, its about love and loving and giving and making the right choices... even through impossible epiphanies.
And of course, I cried. Tears poured silently down my face as the girl realizes the value of true, silent, eternal love.. as she makes a difficult, but the right choice (this sentence sounds so cheesy, but whatever. That is love for you ;).
As the girl realizes who her "Rab" (which is Punjabi for God) is. For that is what the movie is all about... seeing God in the one you love...
"Tujhme rab dikhta hai...yaara mai kya karoon" goes the refrain in the movie.
Another reason I loved the movie was because of Amritsar. My mother belongs to the city, so I have a lot of family there. And also because of the Golden Temple (the movie has a lot of scenes of the Golden temple, with major moments happening there). Where we would go every time we visited Amritsar, every year in the summer vacation. Where I learnt to make my childish requests to God. Where I sat eating the awesome 'kadha'. Where I prayed and hoped as I circled the Wishing Tree.
Where I last went a few days before I got married. To get Rab's blessings. To say thanks.
To say that I had found the one person in the world, in whom I could see God.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Pyaag
Kya pyaag hai, yeh pyaag hai,
thodi si pyaas, kuchh aag hai
in do abhaagon ka ik bhaag hai
pyaag to wo pyaas hai jo
peene se na ghate
pyaag to wo aag hai jo
pani se na hate
pyaag wo khalish hai jo
tere hone se na bhare
pyaag wo khwaish hai jo
tere milne se na mare
dhadhakte hue sholon ki aag hai
laga hai jo chunari par wo daag hai
kabhi saanch hai kabhi aanch hai
kabhi malhar to kabhi deepak raag hai
thodi si pyaas, kuchh aag hai
in do abhaagon ka ik bhaag hai
pyaag to wo pyaas hai jo
peene se na ghate
pyaag to wo aag hai jo
pani se na hate
pyaag wo khalish hai jo
tere hone se na bhare
pyaag wo khwaish hai jo
tere milne se na mare
dhadhakte hue sholon ki aag hai
laga hai jo chunari par wo daag hai
kabhi saanch hai kabhi aanch hai
kabhi malhar to kabhi deepak raag hai
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Cafe Culture
One of the things I love most in this country (yes, there are actually quite a lot of things I like in this country, esp. the bathrooms) is its Cafe culture.
The fact that one can go and sit in one of these places for hours on end. People go and sit there working, reading, doing stuff on their laptops (most provide free wi-fi), eating, drinking, talking, doing homework...whatever.
They are places to meet, places to live- simply places to BE...
I love that. One can just sit happily for hours, watching the world go by ( all for the cost of a small cup of tea). No irate waiter is there to tell you to leave and go once you have finished your drink/food.
Every time I feel lonely, I usually go to one of these places. They are warm, welcoming and they smell..ohh..so...good.
Of freshly roasted coffee... newly baked cakes... roasted cheese...warm just-out-of-the-oven bread..
I often sit there watching people out of the windows, curled up with a book, or just my thoughts.
They do provide human contact of a kind. Maybe, in this lonely country, that is why they are so popular. When everybody is running short of time, these are the places where one can sit and relax and take a break from life. Where one can just be... alone, but not lonely...
Where one can stop and smell the roses...err... coffee!!
The fact that one can go and sit in one of these places for hours on end. People go and sit there working, reading, doing stuff on their laptops (most provide free wi-fi), eating, drinking, talking, doing homework...whatever.
They are places to meet, places to live- simply places to BE...
I love that. One can just sit happily for hours, watching the world go by ( all for the cost of a small cup of tea). No irate waiter is there to tell you to leave and go once you have finished your drink/food.
Every time I feel lonely, I usually go to one of these places. They are warm, welcoming and they smell..ohh..so...good.
Of freshly roasted coffee... newly baked cakes... roasted cheese...warm just-out-of-the-oven bread..
I often sit there watching people out of the windows, curled up with a book, or just my thoughts.
They do provide human contact of a kind. Maybe, in this lonely country, that is why they are so popular. When everybody is running short of time, these are the places where one can sit and relax and take a break from life. Where one can just be... alone, but not lonely...
Where one can stop and smell the roses...err... coffee!!
Friday, November 07, 2008
Catalog Love
Yes, I am addicted- to catalogs. To all the different companies/stores that keep sending them in the mail.
Ikea, Crate & Barrel, Macy's, Bed & Bath, AAA Living, even the Henry Ford (which I got two days ago)- I devour each and every one of them. I read every single article/item/piece description, how it looks, the variety of colors it would be available in, the shapes, the different sizes, the mix-and-match stuff, etc. Of course, the most difficult part is matching the A,B,C's to the item description, but I do it.
I spend hours and hours poring over these catalogs, looking at every possible item- from complete prefabricated kitchens in IKEA to the smallest table runners in Crate & Barrel.
I know I am not buying anything right now- maybe not even in the near future (after all, I am an unemployed graduate) but still I do this. ALL THE TIME!!!
Maybe I should spend all that time looking for work- that would be the first step to be able to actually afford the hand-made pottery :)
Ikea, Crate & Barrel, Macy's, Bed & Bath, AAA Living, even the Henry Ford (which I got two days ago)- I devour each and every one of them. I read every single article/item/piece description, how it looks, the variety of colors it would be available in, the shapes, the different sizes, the mix-and-match stuff, etc. Of course, the most difficult part is matching the A,B,C's to the item description, but I do it.
I spend hours and hours poring over these catalogs, looking at every possible item- from complete prefabricated kitchens in IKEA to the smallest table runners in Crate & Barrel.
I know I am not buying anything right now- maybe not even in the near future (after all, I am an unemployed graduate) but still I do this. ALL THE TIME!!!
Maybe I should spend all that time looking for work- that would be the first step to be able to actually afford the hand-made pottery :)
Friday, October 31, 2008
Link!!
I usually NEVER link to other places in my blogs- yes, maybe an occasional song, but usually not what other people write. For me, this is more a place where I write about my frustrations, my life and rants, and NOT a place for people to find interesting links- If you want to see/read weird stuff on the internet, go ahead and find it yourself.
My blog is only about ME!!!
(Obviously you are here since you want to know about my life - for everything else, go and check out the Encyclopedia Galactica ;)
However, this time I am linking to an article, something I feel really strongly about.
Go and READ!
A Woman's Place
My blog is only about ME!!!
(Obviously you are here since you want to know about my life - for everything else, go and check out the Encyclopedia Galactica ;)
However, this time I am linking to an article, something I feel really strongly about.
Go and READ!
A Woman's Place
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Any Good News?
There is this intense pressure in Indian society to have a kid the moment one is married- not exactly, but you know what I mean.
One has barely breathed a sigh of relief- oh, I am finally getting married, now the whole world will be off my back- the innumerable buas, chachis, mausis, Mom- all of whom were hounding me to get married!
But they ALL started- a FEW DAYS BEFORE I GOT MARRIED- on the fact that I should have a kid really soon! Nowadays, every time I speak to anybody at all in India, I am asked-
"So, any good news?"
It is not considered possible that I might actually not want to have a child right now- I mean- How can any woman NOT want a child as soon as she can legally have one with complete societal acceptance? That is against the laws of being a good Bharatiya nari.
It is such an all-pervasive idea settled deep into our society- that a woman can not be happy/complete until
1. She is married.
2. She has male offspring IMMEDIATELY.
So I was having this IM conversation with my nephew and my bua (his grandmom)- who is about 18-19 years old (my nephew, not my bua) and here is what happened:
Bua: Beta, khush hai na? (Are you happy) {general routine question she always asks}
Me: Yes, I am happy and fine.
Nephew: No, of course you are not.
Me: What? {surprised} I am!
Nephew: No!
Me: Why? What do you mean? All is well with me.
Nephew: No, because you don't have a child.
Me: Speechless!!!
One has barely breathed a sigh of relief- oh, I am finally getting married, now the whole world will be off my back- the innumerable buas, chachis, mausis, Mom- all of whom were hounding me to get married!
But they ALL started- a FEW DAYS BEFORE I GOT MARRIED- on the fact that I should have a kid really soon! Nowadays, every time I speak to anybody at all in India, I am asked-
"So, any good news?"
It is not considered possible that I might actually not want to have a child right now- I mean- How can any woman NOT want a child as soon as she can legally have one with complete societal acceptance? That is against the laws of being a good Bharatiya nari.
It is such an all-pervasive idea settled deep into our society- that a woman can not be happy/complete until
1. She is married.
2. She has male offspring IMMEDIATELY.
So I was having this IM conversation with my nephew and my bua (his grandmom)- who is about 18-19 years old (my nephew, not my bua) and here is what happened:
Bua: Beta, khush hai na? (Are you happy) {general routine question she always asks}
Me: Yes, I am happy and fine.
Nephew: No, of course you are not.
Me: What? {surprised} I am!
Nephew: No!
Me: Why? What do you mean? All is well with me.
Nephew: No, because you don't have a child.
Me: Speechless!!!
Sunday, September 07, 2008
Dishwasher Lullaby
I realized recently that the sound I love most in the world is the sound of the running dishwasher. I love listening to it- the sloshing and ticking - every sound produces in me a deep visceral joy and contentment.
I love listening to it as it runs, revelling in the knowledge that all my dirty dishes are being cleaned. Often, I run it just before I go to sleep- as I love to fall asleep listening to its watery rhythms- it is definitely the most soothing lullaby in the world!
Yes- you must have guessed by now that I absolutely OD about the state of my dishes (clean or unclean). That is why I love sleeping to the sound of the dishwasher- for it gives me a feeling of gut satisfaction, of a day well spent, of knowing that I will wake up to a clean kitchen...
ohh heaven :)
I love listening to it as it runs, revelling in the knowledge that all my dirty dishes are being cleaned. Often, I run it just before I go to sleep- as I love to fall asleep listening to its watery rhythms- it is definitely the most soothing lullaby in the world!
Yes- you must have guessed by now that I absolutely OD about the state of my dishes (clean or unclean). That is why I love sleeping to the sound of the dishwasher- for it gives me a feeling of gut satisfaction, of a day well spent, of knowing that I will wake up to a clean kitchen...
ohh heaven :)
Friday, August 15, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Me no Gulti
Here's what I have been doing lately.
I've fallen in love with this song.
And have been listening to it non-stop for the last 5 days- on repeat mode on the computer.
I also play it again and again and again in the car. Totally NONSTOP.
(in fact, its even playing right now- I just play it 24/7)
Now that I have am using my husband's computer, I obviously had to explore everything it had (read: me being a nosey parker :)
And found this really great song.
The only problem is:
I DO NOT UNDERSTAND A WORD OF THE SONG!!
I just love the music.
Can somebody translate the whole thing: poetically, not by breaking up the sentences and telling me individual word meanings, but as a coherent beautiful poetic whole.
And now, just because of this song, I want to learn the language. The song is so poetic just to listen to, it would probably be great to actually understand it.
I wish this could be done like in Matrix: somebody plug my head in, and when its over I know the language. Completely- with all its subtleties and nuances.
I would not have to go through the pain of learning it.
Can somebody please teach me Telugu??
(I would ask my husband, but I don't want even more fights ;)
P.S.- Read the first comment under the video. Its hilarious!!!
I've fallen in love with this song.
And have been listening to it non-stop for the last 5 days- on repeat mode on the computer.
I also play it again and again and again in the car. Totally NONSTOP.
(in fact, its even playing right now- I just play it 24/7)
Now that I have am using my husband's computer, I obviously had to explore everything it had (read: me being a nosey parker :)
And found this really great song.
The only problem is:
I DO NOT UNDERSTAND A WORD OF THE SONG!!
I just love the music.
Can somebody translate the whole thing: poetically, not by breaking up the sentences and telling me individual word meanings, but as a coherent beautiful poetic whole.
And now, just because of this song, I want to learn the language. The song is so poetic just to listen to, it would probably be great to actually understand it.
I wish this could be done like in Matrix: somebody plug my head in, and when its over I know the language. Completely- with all its subtleties and nuances.
I would not have to go through the pain of learning it.
Can somebody please teach me Telugu??
(I would ask my husband, but I don't want even more fights ;)
P.S.- Read the first comment under the video. Its hilarious!!!
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Crash!!!
My computer died exactly one week ago!!
Siiiigh!
It was quite awful- a sudden flash of blue lighting, and then everything went black. Gone for ever, moved on into the realms of where computer souls go once they leave their earthly abode.
And the PANIC !!!
Because me being me, I am not very friendly with Mr. Back-Up. Ohh, we've met, and even exchanged a few words occasionally (we had been introduced by my computer).
But we were not exactly bosom buddies, more like nodding acquaintances.
Suddenly I needed to get to know him. Immediately and intimately. With the mutual acquaintance no more. He was extremely elusive- and I had no idea where he lived, or worked or anything.
I was in absolute panic- here was 3 years worth of data and stuff and stuff and data- GONE!!
Pffffftttttt! Chole Gachche (Like the headache and Amrutanjan).
Anyway, went to the Data Recovery center, paid a load of money and got everything back. THANK GOD!! Though I spent 4 days in recurring waves of panic.
So I need a new computer (no, it could not be salvaged and is completely totally dead).
What should I buy? I have no idea about specifications and other such stuff- the only spec that I really want is that it should be RED!
Suggestions and advice needed. NO MACS.
And something SST (sasta, sundar, tikaau).
Siiiigh!
It was quite awful- a sudden flash of blue lighting, and then everything went black. Gone for ever, moved on into the realms of where computer souls go once they leave their earthly abode.
And the PANIC !!!
Because me being me, I am not very friendly with Mr. Back-Up. Ohh, we've met, and even exchanged a few words occasionally (we had been introduced by my computer).
But we were not exactly bosom buddies, more like nodding acquaintances.
Suddenly I needed to get to know him. Immediately and intimately. With the mutual acquaintance no more. He was extremely elusive- and I had no idea where he lived, or worked or anything.
I was in absolute panic- here was 3 years worth of data and stuff and stuff and data- GONE!!
Pffffftttttt! Chole Gachche (Like the headache and Amrutanjan).
Anyway, went to the Data Recovery center, paid a load of money and got everything back. THANK GOD!! Though I spent 4 days in recurring waves of panic.
So I need a new computer (no, it could not be salvaged and is completely totally dead).
What should I buy? I have no idea about specifications and other such stuff- the only spec that I really want is that it should be RED!
Suggestions and advice needed. NO MACS.
And something SST (sasta, sundar, tikaau).
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Yaad
When I was in high school, my Mom introduced me to the wonderful world of ghazals.
And it opened a whole new area of expression of all my teenage angst.
Mom had a really really old diary (dating from her jawani) in which she had written a number of ghazals, and then she would sing them. She often used to sing them to me too, as we both sat in the balcony on hot and humid evenings, the usual electric power cut happening.
(She's got the most amazing voice ever).
As I sit here missing my husband,
these lines from that old diary wafted into my mind (after probably 15 years of hearing them)
"Lamhe lamhe mein basi hai teri yaadon ki mahak,
Aaj ki raat to khushbu ka safar lagti hai..."
And it opened a whole new area of expression of all my teenage angst.
Mom had a really really old diary (dating from her jawani) in which she had written a number of ghazals, and then she would sing them. She often used to sing them to me too, as we both sat in the balcony on hot and humid evenings, the usual electric power cut happening.
(She's got the most amazing voice ever).
As I sit here missing my husband,
these lines from that old diary wafted into my mind (after probably 15 years of hearing them)
"Lamhe lamhe mein basi hai teri yaadon ki mahak,
Aaj ki raat to khushbu ka safar lagti hai..."
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Cooking...Aur Mai?? Kabhi Nahi
And no amount to Pan Pasand is going to change that, unfortunately. Yes, its official-
Indian men are proud of the fact that they can not cook!!
Why one should be proud of lacking a serious life-survival skill is something I just can't understand. Though I should add a disclaimer here- a lot of the men I know cook, and cook really well. But among the ones who don't, what I hate is this tone of pride that they can't cook. So it goes-
Cooking... aur mai?? hehe... kabhi nahi...
(one can almost hear the undertones of- me male, me great, me never stoop to cooking, me has wife to serve me)
It started with me talking to a friend (in India) yesterday. His wife had ordered some Chinese takeout, as she did not cook that night. So I told him that he should have cooked if she did not want/feel like it. And his answer-
Mai to cook nahi karta kabhi (and what infuriated me was that rather than be ashamed of the fact, he was so happy about it).
Then he shot back- So does your pati cook?
Of course he does!! (and my pati cooks a mean chicken curry, but I had the feeling that this guy would die of shock if I told him that me (a woman) eats non-vegetarian food. (Gasp!! Thud!!!)
(No, this is not an assumption, earlier in the conversation he had asked me whether I eat non-veg, and when I said no, his exact words were "Chalo shukr hai, kam se kam non-veg to nahi khaati")
On second thoughts, maybe I should have told him and done his wife a huge favor.
Cooking, in India, is so considered a woman's job and domain that it does not even enter a lot of men's realm of thought that they can actually do it (do I hear another Gasp?
Great :)
I wonder why, because it is simply an essential skill to live- no good, bad or anything connotations attached. Maybe Indian men are so unsure of their masculinity that they are afraid of even venturing into the kitchen. But here, I am over analyzing- I am sure that cooking is so far from their view of the world that it does not even enter their thought processes, ever.
Here's to all the men in the world who cook. Pan Pasand for all of you!
Indian men are proud of the fact that they can not cook!!
Why one should be proud of lacking a serious life-survival skill is something I just can't understand. Though I should add a disclaimer here- a lot of the men I know cook, and cook really well. But among the ones who don't, what I hate is this tone of pride that they can't cook. So it goes-
Cooking... aur mai?? hehe... kabhi nahi...
(one can almost hear the undertones of- me male, me great, me never stoop to cooking, me has wife to serve me)
It started with me talking to a friend (in India) yesterday. His wife had ordered some Chinese takeout, as she did not cook that night. So I told him that he should have cooked if she did not want/feel like it. And his answer-
Mai to cook nahi karta kabhi (and what infuriated me was that rather than be ashamed of the fact, he was so happy about it).
Then he shot back- So does your pati cook?
Of course he does!! (and my pati cooks a mean chicken curry, but I had the feeling that this guy would die of shock if I told him that me (a woman) eats non-vegetarian food. (Gasp!! Thud!!!)
(No, this is not an assumption, earlier in the conversation he had asked me whether I eat non-veg, and when I said no, his exact words were "Chalo shukr hai, kam se kam non-veg to nahi khaati")
On second thoughts, maybe I should have told him and done his wife a huge favor.
Cooking, in India, is so considered a woman's job and domain that it does not even enter a lot of men's realm of thought that they can actually do it (do I hear another Gasp?
Great :)
I wonder why, because it is simply an essential skill to live- no good, bad or anything connotations attached. Maybe Indian men are so unsure of their masculinity that they are afraid of even venturing into the kitchen. But here, I am over analyzing- I am sure that cooking is so far from their view of the world that it does not even enter their thought processes, ever.
Here's to all the men in the world who cook. Pan Pasand for all of you!
Saturday, May 31, 2008
A Celebration of Love
So, I saw Sex and the City (the movie) yesterday (first day, third show :)
And absolutely luurrrrrrrrrvvvvvvved it.
It is just so beautiful, so sweet, so poignant, so "love"!!
That is the only way to describe the movie- its all about LOVE - all-encompassing, forgiving, generous, sorry, painful, difficult, beautiful, emotional, hopeful, endearing- its love, love, love :)
(Yes, that's the sappy grin on my face that still has not gone 24 hours after seeing the movie :)
Its about "happily ever after" and more importantly, about believing in happily ever after. Its about having dreams of love, and getting there, albeit with innumerable trials, tribulations and triumphs.
It brings a whole new meaning to "Love conquers all" :)
(yup, goofy grin again).
I know- I am a hopelessly sappy romantic mushy stars in the eyes happily ever after believer- so obviously I totally related to the movie (just as I have always been in love with the TV series).
Its definitely a must see for all diehard romantics- simply because you believe in love, and even more if you like "the girls".
(goofy grin with stars in my eyes- I have no idea how to emoticon that).
The girls have grown older, have mellowed, maybe wiser- yet they are all quintessentially the same, with the same quest for true love. And they find it- be it within themselves or outside.
It is this patchwork quilt of life, with its unbearable pain knitted in with its hilarious moments, its grief and anger, its learning to forgive, its pure joy, its guilt, and self-doubt and questions and finding answers and looking forward...
Looking forward, and looking beyond- beyond labels (on both clothes and people), beyond names, beyond self, beyond ego... and even beyond love...
So, taking a quote from the movie... "Get Carried Away"
:)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)